you can't just throw a normal party anymore: a case study

40% of party attendees left with a new crush

First, a debrief on Normal Party

last summer, we decided we’d had enough of all the theme parties that seem unavoidable in san francisco. couldn’t we just have a normal party? so we decided we’d do just that…

we had the time of our lives promoting Normal Party – sending out little text blasts with haikus and mysterious allusions. we even made a promotional video dispelling myths associated with our party…

then the actual day came. the vibe was stilted, the feng shui was off, and then an after-midnight crowd arrived. we thought maybe things would turn around. but then it devolved into a whip-it-induced downward spiral…

the next morning, we couldn’t hide our disappointment. and some of our guests were bold enough to shoot straight into our hearts:

so we gave up on hosting parties for a while… until we were inspired by lauren’s call to host. emboldened, we decided we’d try again in Q1 2026. and what better occasion than valentine’s day, conveniently on a saturday smack dab in the middle of Q1?

The Valentine’s Day Party

the house was QUIET at first… the air felt menacingly uncertain… then, at 9pm, an hour after the official start time, the floodgates opened…

guests could choose their own adventure - some quietly read through our ‘love library’ of pickup artistry and sex-ed books, others made friends at our makeshift bar, traded jello-shots studded with maraschino cherries, and a few of us took over the aux cable and danced. sound healing by natasja moved to one bedroom, and unbeknownst to us, a few illicit activities migrated all the way down the hallway to another bedroom. despite the rain, the party spilled outside into the street. the Hangout Geometry was complex, but incredibly functional…

we, the hosts, scarcely interacted with each other during the night, except for some quick exclamations of success… it was palpable! but did the data support our feelings in the moment?

Valentine’s Day Post-Party Survey Results

By the Numbers…

74% of survey respondents said they had “Criminal Levels” of fun at our party. When we asked about favorite activities, respondents said…

the most popular activity was “The ‘why did you put this sticker on me?’ game,” an idea we came up with while panicking about how we had promised activities but hadn’t prepared a single one…

we mercilessly ignored requests to reveal what the stickers meant, leaving our guests to speculate amongst themselves, use the colors as flirtation fuel, or simply feel unsettled… as it turns out, everyone just wants to FEEL something.

two very important metrics of success, and we smashed them both.

40% of survey respondents leaving with a new crush?????? insane…

wish we had more details here…

The best free responses

Favorite person at the party and why

It was a man on the couch, swimming in the book “How to Succeed with Women,” that stole my attention. Surrounded by beautiful people, our young hero’s attention was wrestling with the notion that the 1545 could have such a book. His internal monologue was humming, asking the big questions: “Is this sarcastic?” “Are these hosts regressionists?”, and “Is this party a cult recruitment event?”, and “Why did I not eat before this? All they have is RFK Jr diet style bites.”

Best riffs

i asked one of the weed brothers how business was going and he said “selling weed”

Not so much a riff, but I learned a new game where relative strangers got in a circle, selected someone to stand inside, had them close their eyes, and spun them around. Then the folks on the outside of the circle would trade places while the person in the center's eyes closed. Finally, the person in the center’s hand would be guided to someone in the circle’s neck and then had to guess who they were by the shape of their neck.

Breaking down the physics of the ‘helicopter’ (Kama sutra, page 60)

Crushes and missed connections

i have a crush on every boy - teen girl squad reference

Ah, did I ever! Big night for big eyes, let me tell you. Don’t know if it was the jello shots, the booch crafts, the burnt lighting, or the human soul trying to escape the dog days of the year of the snake, but people’s eyes at this party had a lot to say. There was an Irish-looking girl with big blue eyes whom I would love to get to know better, as well as a tall blonde with warm eyes who made this vagabond feel at home.

Forgot her name fml

If I say anything I am in big trouble

Ok I thought this guy Joey was kinda cute but he was there with two girls so idk . I also left right after I met him lol I was tired

The party pledge

A whopping 18 out of 20 respondents pledged to have One Party Per Quarter, with eight of them committing to actual dates:

In Conclusion

why was the party so good? ultimately, it was the people and their open hearts… our little shenanigans simply guided everyone along.

we’ll be back in Q2 with another banger… in the words of “weed brother” Eli… “2026, we’re bangin that shit out… bang bang bang bang bang BANG”

P.S. whoever Partiful crushed us: